Under a princess tree

[Karasu_Noroi]

Όνομα Συγγραφέα: Χρήστος Μπάρδας

Είδος: Ρομαντικό διήγημα

Πλοκή: ;Boy meets girl etc

Γλώσσα: Αγγλικά

Βία; Όχι

Σεξ; Όχι

Αυτοτελής; Ναι

Σχόλια: αυτό είναι ένα short story που έγραψα για μία κοπέλα, τον μεγαλύτερο Unrequited Love της ζωής μου, όλο το κείμενο είναι διάσπαρτο με στοιχεία που αφορούν αυτή. Σε γενικές γραμμές, είναι μία μίξη της αληθινής ιστορίας με το "what could have been"....

Judge it gently pliz ;)

 

Under a princess Tree

The last Show He could hear them chanting his name.

“CHRIS! CHRIS!”

They wanted to hear his music. It used to make him happy but not anymore. He strapped on his new guitar, a gift by his new sponsor. It was a Les Paul, he coveted that guitar as a small boy and always dreams of owning one. He walked on the stage and the crowd exploded.

 

7 years before

 

Chris was sitting on the sofa, anxiously waiting for the boss to call him in. He was in the office of the largest producing company in the world and he had an appointment with one of the toughest guys in the business. He was only 18, a kid from a small town that happed to record a low budget demo with his original songs. That demo reached a magazine, got a great critic and that delivered a series of gigs in the towns around his own. In one of these shows, an experienced eye caught his performance and went over and introduced himself after the show.

 

John Baum, Exec. Vice President of A&R for Atlantic Records. A tall guy in his mid 50es that had spent all his life inside the rock music industry, from scouting bands in his youth (he discovered Soundgarden and Nirvana) to actually running the label. He told him he loved his songs, especially “Mine”, and he would like to offer him a deal with the label.

 

Oh the joy!!! He packed his equipment as fast as he could and drove home. Not his home but hers. The loving muse of “Mine”. He called her “his dark winged fairy” and such a smile she showed him after hearing the news. She was slender, with straight black hair, beautiful eyes and lips to die for. They drove to their favorite spot, the park where they first met…

 

The Meeting

 

It was late afternoon and he was sitting on the sidewalk in one of the small parks downtown, playing guitar as she was returning from school. She seemed anxious to get to somewhere but just as she passed in front of him, she turned her head and it happened. That perfect moment that you think only happens in novels. When their eyes met, the most beautiful melody came out of his mouth. It was a song he had never played before, lyrics straight from his heart and “Mine” was born. And love was born.

 

“You came with the shadows

On the reach of the night

like a dark winged fairy

with the brightest of smiles

 

and i wrapped you around me

felt your skin to my own

we were one in each other

we were one as a whole

 

by the dark of your hair,

the sweet of your lips

and the warmth of your arms

i call you a soul mate, a partner in crime

and this night is forever,

cause you are the night,

as i am the moon that sleeps by your side”

 

When he was done, he opened his eyes and it was dark already. There wasn’t anyone else at the park and a small breeze swept through his hair and calmed him down. He was used to being alone all his life. A quiet boy most of the times, had some friends but not so easy on expressing himself through anything else but music and lyrics.

He had grown used to opening his eyes somewhere alone, it was not something that made him sad, sometimes he thought that this was his true nature.

OK, there were many times, usually with some of his friends, when he would break loose and act crazy and stupid like a small kid but when those crazy moments ended he longed for his own castle of solitude where as another Superman he would fly with his thoughts.

Superman I say? Well, not the unbreakable one, not the red blue blur with the cape and the flying above skyscrapers. I mean the other one.

The alien one.

The one who didn’t fit in this world completely, who run and strengthened for the people around him but never became one of them. The one who always flew alone.

But this time it was different, she was still there, sitting opposite to him. Smiling that cute little smile he was sure he ‘d never forget and playing with her hair. On the road next to her she had left her notes, homework… what seemed important before was now tossed aside.

He reached his arm and held her hand in to his own. Taking her scent in, they embraced….her name was autumn. ….

 

The Change

 

And then change happened. Not of considerable size but of great quality. In his everyday life, his relations with his friends, his band mates and the label guys was unchanged, but for a hint of smile now appearing more and more often on his face. He was the same guy that didn’t speak much but inside, fire burnt. He wanted to see her, he wanted to get to know her to the core, her feelings, her anger, her lust, her fear, her dreams and then even more… and he also wanted for her to get to know him, to see him as he is, not as he seems.

 

For that, he dove into his feelings, and they surfaced…

They surfaced to his music, to his lyrics, to the things he told her late at night when everyone else was sound asleep. Yes, he was afraid of getting hurt. Yes, he was afraid of hurting her. He had seen human relations hurt people to extreme points before. Him also. But how can you avoid that?

By not living?

By making regrets?

By not giving your all?

When you shoot your feelings too high, you might fall hard but you might also reach for the stars, And that’s what he did, alien as he was…he reached for the stars…

He spent almost all days in the studio recording his first album and she spent almost all days studying for school. But when the night came they were together. Making dreams for the future. A career, art, changing the world and finally a house with a green door and swings on the yard. The everyday moments, when they would thrive in each other’s arms and the looks they dedicate to their hearts. All made of love. And they worked hard for it.

 

The first tour

 

His first recordwas a hit! It had been out only for a month when it reached platinum status. And above all was “Mine”. Chris was adamant about not releasing it as a single. Baum on the others had protested and tried for the opposite. He was right by financial standards. “Mine” was the most played track of the record when it came to radio shows. It had blown away all the records singles by far.

But Chris wanted to hear no more. Her song was not to be about money, not to be about market…it was special and that it would remain.

 

Summer came and with that, the first cross country tour. She was there with him. They shared a bed all throughout the country and lived in the moment. In between shows they would climb on the roof of the tour bus and just lay there looking at the stars and talking about the future. They dreamt more and more vividly of that house with the green door, a “princess” tree in the yard and the pair of swings.

 

Even if he had a shred of doubt in the beginning, he was sure by now. This girl was worth it all. She was not only extremely beautiful, that he could tell from the beginning, but what he came to love even more was her personality. She was free from the tangles that societies and the status quo ordered. A brilliant mind in search of new experiences, with dreams that set her apart and not a part of the system. Strong willed up to most points but in need of reassurance now and then. A beautiful human, a gorgeous woman that sometimes got upset on the most trivial matters but loved even harder. He couldn’t ask for more.

 

One day, on the road to the next gig, the bus stopped at a small town to get supplies. Chris and Autumn took the chance and went on a stroll. He was holding her hand and it felt warm and soothing. She was smiling to him as they made their way outside of the town into the fields. There they saw it. A beautiful house with a green door and a big yard. There was even a princess tree outside. It was exactly as they dreamt about it, and it was empty!

Chris found two small boards, bought some rope from the local market and he built the two swings. And there, under the princess tree, they kissed.

 

The show later that night, in the nearby city went great. The crowd loved the songs and especially “Mine” which Chris sang with his acoustic guitar looking throughout the song directly into her eyes in the front row. After the concert they were supposed to spend the night together but the reporters and the crowd were all over him. She understood…they were in love afterall.

That happened again, and again. He was at fault and he knew it, but he was sure their relationship was gonna last everything.

Then she went to finish her studies abroad and the night before, they made love and promised each other forever. But forever was a big word. And the distance grew even farther…

She loved her job and her studies, and she loved her freedom too. Being stuck on a telephone all day was not what she was born to do. He understood. He heard her voice and the words she chose when they talked… and though they were kind and reassuring, he could tell.

She was not happy.

That killed him. This relationship was built on understanding and freedom and she felt asphyxiated even though she never told him. One time he actually thought of calling her and saying he met another girl and that she should forget him and move on. He knew that would devastate her but in the long run she would have moved on. The idea of her shedding even one tear on his behalf though, wiped that thought of his mind. In the end he chose the only way visible to him. He let her drift apart. Day by day he could hear in their talks how she grew distant, not by force but by her own choice and every day he died. And later their talks became SMS , then E-mails and then just pm’s on Facebook. Finally, one day her account was deleted.

Chris was Superman once more.

 

Today

 

He could hear them chanting his name.

“CHRIS! CHRIS!”

They wanted to hear his music. It used to make him happy but not anymore. He strapped on his new guitar, a gift by his new sponsor. It was a Les Paul, he coveted that guitar as a small boy and always dreamt of owning one. He walked on the stage and the crowd exploded.

 

He was exhausted but didn’t want to lay down. He walked to the hotel room window and took a glimpse outside. This was the city. This is where it all begun. This is where he let her go, where he disappointed her for the first time…

In front of him, on the table, was a yellowed newspaper, a month old. On the back cover with bold letters autumns return in the country was announced. She looked different… tired maybe, even lonely, at least she had made a name for herself, out there, without him.

His own body felt like it was borrowed. Hollow skin, tattooed by a lifestyle he didn’t want. After the break up he never wrote a song as good as “Mine”.

He reached his arm and grabbed his guitar. Not the new one, the prestige model he used on stage earlier, but the old one, the one he wrote “Mine” on that day at the park. He had been carrying it with him since then but it felt strange after all this time.

And then he remembered….

 

He opened the windows and searched the horizon. Somewhere out there he swore he could see the house with the green door, in the town nearby.

 

The Ending illusional melody

 

He moved with the guitar in hand, it was an old thing, you could hardly believe it still worked. The resonance was defeaning…

 

She opened the door of her new house and let the wind blow her black hair as if she was racing somewhere. Peace and honesty and a familiar melody filled her mind and the empty room behind her.

 

That house in the Valley far away, it had a green door and two swings but there were no children, there were no parents.

 

Chris, saw the shimmering darkness in the dark. The dark winged fairy was racing through the fields and he shot his thought at her.

Both bodies reached the ground the same time. Lifeless but not soulless and they were smiling

 

and at the house, two swings were moving under the princess tree and a couple was kissing again.

 

 

[Διγέλαδος]

Χμμ πολύ μοναχικό ανάγνωσμα. Λέει ο χαρακτήρας ότι αυτή η κοπέλα ήταν ο έρωτας της ζωής του. Αλλά ούτε καν την είδα, ούτε καν την άκουσα. Περισσότερο περιγράφεις τον έρωτα που είχε για αυτήν, παρά την ίδια. Ωραία η παρομοίωση με τον Σούπερμαν. Όλο το διήγημα θα μπορούσες να το κάνεις και τραγούδι, ο τρόπος που γράφεις θυμίζει στοίχους. Όμως δεν είδα αυτή τη συναισθηματική φόρτηση στο τέλος για να μπορέσεις να με πείσεις για την κατάληξη αυτό που είδα ήταν μια συναισθηματική αποξένωση και απομάκρυνση από την ηρωίδα μόνο (αν και από την αρχή έτσι αισθανόμουν για τον τρόπο που την έβλεπε). Θα μπορούσες να γράψεις πως τον επηρέαζε όλο αυτό στις σκέψεις του κτλ προς το τέλος για παράδειγμα.

 

Μήπως θα έπρεπε να πάει στην κατηγορία "Διάφορες Ιστορίες";

Edited May 28, 2010 by Διγέλαδος

[Karasu_Noroi]

Χμμ πολύ μοναχικό ανάγνωσμα. Λέει ο χαρακτήρας ότι αυτή η κοπέλα ήταν ο έρωτας της ζωής του. Αλλά ούτε καν την είδα, ούτε καν την άκουσα. Περισσότερο περιγράφεις τον έρωτα που είχε για αυτήν, παρά την ίδια. Ωραία η παρομοίωση με τον Σούπερμαν. Όλο το διήγημα θα μπορούσες να το κάνεις και τραγούδι, ο τρόπος που γράφεις θυμίζει στοίχους. Όμως δεν είδα αυτή τη συναισθηματική φόρτηση στο τέλος για να μπορέσεις να με πείσεις για την κατάληξη αυτό που είδα ήταν μια συναισθηματική αποξένωση και απομάκρυνση από την ηρωίδα μόνο (αν και από την αρχή έτσι αισθανόμουν για τον τρόπο που την έβλεπε). Θα μπορούσες να γράψεις πως τον επηρέαζε όλο αυτό στις σκέψεις του κτλ προς το τέλος για παράδειγμα.

 

Μήπως θα έπρεπε να πάει στην κατηγορία "Διάφορες Ιστορίες";

 

Η αλήθεια είναι ότι έπεσες μέσα σχεδόν σε όλα όσα λες. Απλά να προσθέσω ότι αυτό ήθελα ή ένοιωθα να πετύχω. Η κοπέλα ήταν ο έρωτας της ζωής του, ή μου αν θές γιατί δεν κρύβομαι για μένα είναι όλο αυτό. Απλά κάθε φορά που πήγαινα να τις δώσω πιο ενεργό ρόλο ένοιωθα άσχημα, ένοιωθα ότι δεν ήταν πραγματικά αυτή,απλά αυτή όπως θα ήθελα εγώ να ενεργήσει. Μου φαινόταν.. μή ηθικό και ίσως ψεύτικο.

Μην ξεχνάς ότι ήταν unrequited love οπότε δεν είχα κάτι χειροπιαστό απο πλευράς της για να περιγράψω, γι αυτό προτίμησα ότι γράψω να είναι αποκλειστηκά και μόνο μέσα απο τα δικά μου μάτια και αποκλειστικά τα δικά μου συναισθήματα. Και αν βγάζει μία μοναξιά και αποξένωση απο κάτι ουσιαστικό, well έτσι ήταν...

 

Το τέλος βρίσκεται αρκετά χρόνια μετά, οπ΄ποτε η συναισθηματική φόρτιση έχει δώσει τη θέση της σε μία σκληρή συνειδητοποίηση. Εξ΄αλλου αυτό το έγραψα εν μέσω όλης της κατάστασης οπότε ίσως δείχνει και το πόσο ανάγκη είχα για ένα γρήγορο happy ending

Edited May 28, 2010 by Karasu_Noroi

[Διγέλαδος]

Το τέλος βρίσκεται αρκετά χρόνια μετά, οπ΄ποτε η συναισθηματική φόρτιση έχει δώσει τη θέση της σε μία σκληρή συνειδητοποίηση. Εξ΄αλλου αυτό το έγραψα εν μέσω όλης της κατάστασης οπότε ίσως δείχνει και το πόσο ανάγκη είχα για ένα γρήγορο happy ending

 

Τότε γράψτο κι αυτό. Γράψε δηλαδή ότι το έκανε γιατί είχε ανάγκη για ένα γρήγορο τέλος αφού τα συνειδητοποίησε όλα αυτά, με το δικό σου λυρικό τρόπο φυσικά.