My 1:1

[DinMacXanthi]

Όνομα Συγγραφέα: Κέλλης Κωνσταντίνος

Είδος: Φαντασία

Βία; Όχι

Σεξ; Όχι

Αριθμός Λέξεων: 410

Αυτοτελής; Ναι

Σχόλια: Μια ιδέα που είχα πει κάποτε στον αδερφό μου "Φαντάζεσαι αν;" Είπα να το κάνω σαν μικρή άσκηση και το έγραψα μέσα σε ένα τεταρτάκι. Μακάρι να μπορούσα να κάνω πραγματικά το δώρο της ιστορίας στον Δημήτρη και για μένα θα το άξιζε. Όπως και να'χει, ένα κειμενάκι 100% αφιερωμένο στον πιο ωραίο τύπο του κόσμου.

 

 

1:1

 

The little boy sat on the floor of his bedroom, surrounded by his toys. Part of the room was covered in darkness but there was light over his shoulder as he looked at his new toy, a small ball made out of his playing dough, blue and green with a tiny smudge of white.

 

''Hmm, stars. They are pretty.'' He said and smiled. And thus they appeared, spinning around the toddler, sparkling and gleaming right before his hazel eyes. He stood on his little legs and walked around it. He looked at the stillness of the sea, earth and sky and frowned. It seemed wrong somehow, unfinished. Then he snapped two chubby fingers and there it was; the ball started whirling around itself. So, he sat and watched as the winds were born and the seasons came to be and the first wave stretched itself upon the whiteness of the sands.

 

''He should like that.'' He said approvingly as he put his thumb between his lips. Then he sneezed and that blast of wind made the ball instantly turn white and cold. Looking puzzled, he touched it with his saliva-covered thumb and the frost burned the tip of the finger. He quickly drew it away but the change was dramatic on the small globe. The whiteness seemed to slowly melt away, starting from the point of his touch. The toy was back to its previous blue-green form in no time. And where he had touched, a few moments of immeasurable time ago, something stirred and raised its newborn eyes to its sky and looked in wonder at the little boy, amidst the stars.

 

So he picked up the ball and sat up, walking out of the room, towards the big silent staircase of the house. An older boy stood there, calmly reading a book. He left the book by his side, as he watched his younger brother climb the big steps, curly hairs bouncing on his little head and something shining bright in his plump hands. The toddler came and sat next to him, on the last step and smiled. He leaned his head upon the big boy’s arm and opened his palms, revealing the gift. Chants could be heard emanating from the globe. They sounded funny.

 

''Happy birthday big brother.'' The little boy said and handing it over, he gave him a sloppy kiss on the cheek. Then he ran down the stairs and went outside to play.

 

 

 

 

edit: stir οχι steer, much obliged Dino, I'll blame it on sleep deprivation. (είχα γράψει και chick αντί για cheek, αλλά το διόρθωσα πριν το ανεβάσω )

Edited July 5, 2009 by Dinosxanthi

[Equilibrium]

Nice little storry about brothers caring. It was easy going sort but to be honest I was able to follow that easily on the english. Maybe it's that I just got up. I guess it was more like an experiment. I liked it in the whole fo what it was. certainly not something we normaly read but it was worth writting. I can't find something to critisize about it since it didn't leave me any blanks or found any spots thaqt realy needed change.

 

Thanks for posting I guess. Bigger brothers all over the forum apreciate it (me included, I hope my younger brother feels the same)

 

Christos

 

*Sorry for writting in eglish but my keyboard has no greek characters yet and I don't want to install them just yet.

[DinoHajiyorgi]

*Sorry for writting in eglish but my keyboard has no greek characters yet and I don't want to install them just yet.

Don't want?! Don't want?!

 

 

Υπέροχο φλασάκι Κωνσταντίνε. Σα να κοίταζα μια σειρά από πανέμορφες, εικονογραφημένες καρτ-ποστάλ.

 

...something steered and raised its newborn eyes to its sky...

stirred

 

Edited July 5, 2009 by DinoHajiyorgi