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Famous Last Words


Naurgul

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Όνομα Συγγραφέα: Νικόλας Τ.

Είδος: flash-fiction

Αριθμός Λέξεων: 320

Αυτοτελής: Ναι

Σχόλια: Είναι στα αγγλικά.

 

 

 

Famous Last Words

It was a hot summer day, somewhere in the States. At the outskirts of a smallish town, there was a bus station. There, two men, one in a black business suit, the other wearing a white shirt and blue jeans, waited, presumably for a bus. “You are going to die.”, said the man in the business suit patting the other one on the shoulder, gently. “Excuse me?” he replied. “I said, you are going to die.” repeated the man in the black business suit. Laughing half-heartedly, the man in the white shirt said “Why did you say that?”. “Why not? It's true.” the other one replied. Thinking he was humoring him, the man in the white shirt said “Well, shouldn't you be a bit more dramatic? Someone standing next to you is going to die and all you have to say is that, calmly as if it's the weather we're talking about?”. The man in the black business suit turned to face the man in the white shirt and the blue jeans. “I'm sorry, it's not dramatic to me.” The man in the white shirt winked and said “Oh, I get it, you mean I'm going to die, sometime in the future. Haha”. He laughed hard. “No, I meant right now” said the man in the black suit, all serious. The man in the white shirt was becoming agitated: “Why the hell aren't you dramatic about it, then?”. The man in the business suit just shrugged and said “It's only my job”. The man in the white shirt was getting bored of the whole thing. “Oh, I see.” he said and turned to face the street again. Before he knew it, the man in the business suit took out a gun and shot him dead. “Oh, I see.”, the man in the black business suit repeated, as he wrote it down on a small notebook. “That's a good one”.

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Wow, αυτός κι αν είναι κυνικός και διεστραμμένος χαρακτήρας! Πολύ ωραίο φλασάκι, Guardian!

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Guardian, "βλέπω" την εικόνα των δύο στη στάση, και μπορώ να πω ότι μου κεντρίζει τη φαντασία. Και έχει πλάκα και το "χόμπι" του δολοφόνου στο τέλος. Ανεκδοτολογικό, το φλασάκι σου, και "ευχάριστο" (που λέει ο λόγος).

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:thmbup: Πάρα πολύ ωραίο. Κυνικό, απλό, χιουμοριστικό, to the point! Πετυχημένος ο δολοφόνος. Το γεγονός ότι είναι τόσο μικρό αποσπά το μυαλό από λεπτομέρειες-απορίες στις οποίες θα παρασύρονταν αν ήταν μεγαλύτερο (π.χ. μα καλά, δεν τους βλέπει κανείς κτλ).
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  • 5 months later...

Με την εξαίρεση του τίτλου, που τον βρήκα αποπροσανατολιστικό, μια πολύ έξυπνη ιδέα και μια πολύ αποτελεσματική εκτέλεσή της (με την καλή έννοια!) Well done!

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Εμενα μου αρεσε πολυ. Ειναι η πιο ολοκληρωμενη και συντομοτερη ιστορια που εχω διαβασει ποτε. Και φυσικα μακαβρια :lol:

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